The Twisted Knot Woodshop Presents...

It's All About Me!
(Nobody else, just ME!)

You see, you're about to read my biography - provided you stick around long enough, that is. Therefore, if you're looking for information about someone else, then you really need to toddle off to their page because you ain't gonna find a damn thing out about anybody else on this here page. ST!

I guess the best place to start is the beginning. I was born on April 28th, in the year of our Dear Darling Lordie Pie 1959, at Wheelus Air Force base, which was located in North African city of Tripoli. At the time my parents were stationed in Greece but that country had no hospitals worth the powder to blow 'em to Hell so they sent Mom 'n me to Tripoli.

 

They were forced to keep me and somewhere along the way I guess I musta done something to deserve a...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I reckon all that water didn't hurt me too damn bad cuz I lived to see my first...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then I learned to demand a little respect and cut into my two sisters' food rations and grew up to become a very dapper young man....

 

 

 

 

 

My Mother (that's her there keeping me close under thumb) told me the institution of Cub Scouts was a necessary requirement to build character. I told her she was daft cuz I already had all the character anyone could ever need.

By the end of that week I could almost see out of my right eye.

 

 

 

Eventually I acquired sufficient age to "move on" to Jr. High School and the very second I got there pooberty hit me hard (10 points if you can name the movie I stole that phrase from).

I grew up in a ranch style house located 4 miles east of the small town of Remington, Virginia, on Rte 651. It was surrounded by a dense growth of hardwoods and our closest neighbors were about 1/3 of a mile on either side of us.